Modest is the Hottest

Emily attended "Mormon Prom" Saturday night with her good friend, Daniel. Daniel and his mother drove all the way from Stockton so they could share this special evening.

Emily had a GREAT time, but it was not an easy project getting ready for Prom. It took a small village to make sure that Emily would feel comfortable with her outfit.

We found a fairly modest dress at a store. It was on clearance so the price was right but we would need to do alterations and find a shrug.

We searched two malls and a large outlet shopping center looking for a shrug that she could wear to make the dress modest. We struck out. It was my friend Karen who found the perfect shrug for Emily.

The dress was a little large. My mother happily took in the side seams so it would fit better.

Emily wanted to shorten the dress to knee length. I wasn't comfortable doing this. Through the help of my sister-in-law Shauna and niece, Chelsie, we found someone who could not only shorten the dress but add new spaghetti straps. The ones that came with the dress were so loose that they weren't effective. The woman who altered the dress was very reasonable. I appreciated her help.

As I watched Emily head off to Prom with Daniel, her cousins, and their dates, she looked lovely. She sparkled and look self-confident and comfortable because she knows that "modest is the hottest."

Chelsie, Danny, Emily, Daniel, Stacie, and Ricardo. Don't they look great?

I thought you would enjoy this video. One young woman also found prom dress shopping a frustrating experience and decided to do something about it.



She is my new hero.

Graduation Checklist

Graduation preparations are underway.

Cap and Gown....Check.

New dress for Emily....Check.

New outfit for me......Uncheck.

Haircut for Ron....Check.

Food for car trip.....Check.

Books on CD for trip.....Check.

Clean clothes....Check.

Oil change and full tank of gas.....Check.

I have searched for a cute new dress or skirt ensemble to wear for graduation without success. It doesn't really matter because no one will be able to SEE the cute new dress or skirt ensemble because of the robe covering it. But, it's always fun to have a new outfit. Not that it would fit in my undersized closet. But, I would have made ROOM for it somewhere. Sigh. How I miss my old closet. Now THAT was a closet! It was also where our newborns slept for the first few months of life. It was that big.

On the way home from work, Ron stopped and got a haircut. It was badly needed. Emily commented on his "tan line." There is a good half inch of white skin showing where his hair used to be.

"You look great!" I told him. "You are ready for our BGS commercial!"

"I haven't had a haircut!" Emily shrieked! "I'm not ready for the BGS commercial."

"Ahhh, but you have a cute new dress. That will make up for the hair."

Three more days....and I'll be an official college graduate!

Three more days to see if I'm offered a starring role in an upcoming BGS commercial.

Jennifer, how does your hair look?

American Idol--The Final 8

Before we talk about this week, I think we need to have a moment of silence to mourn the departure of Pia. I really thought she would be in the final four. I believe everyone thought she would go further than she did. Alas, I was wrong.

On a happier note, I predicted that Stefano and Jacob would be in the bottom three. After two weeks, I am 66.66667% accurate in my bottom three predictions. Let's see how well I do this week.

Last night's theme was "Movie Songs."

Paul McDonald: "Old Time Rock and Roll" from Risky Business--Paul McDonald pulled out another rose-covered suit. He had a great time bopping all over the stage and shaking his tambourine. What made this song special however wasn't Paul's performance but the amazingly talented female saxophone player. I like Paul, but he's a better performer when he plays the guitar. It keeps him grounded and more likely to sing into the mic.

Lauren Alaina: "The Climb" from Miley Cyrus's Hannah Montana movie. This movie would not be considered GREAT by anyone but a pre-teen's standards. But, this song fit well with Lauren and what she is going through right now. She sang it with a great deal of emotion. You could tell that she REALLY connected with this song.

Stefano Langone: "End of the Road" from Boomerang. This Boyz II Men song fits Stefano's vocals beautifully. I could almost PICTURE him being in a boy band post-idol. Good job on connecting with the audience better. Perhaps he got the memo--there was much less lip licking this week. I was proud of him. I also felt sorry for him. I'm sure he felt survivor's guilt that after ending up in the bottom two last week that he was safe and beautiful, talented Pia was sent home.

Scotty McCreery: "I Cross My Heart" from Pure Country. Wow! You know how embarrassing it is to admit that I haven't seen one of these movies so far? Not even on cable. Thank goodness, I've heard of the songs. OK, back to Scotty's performance. I didn't enjoy it too much. I know, I am a Scotty fan, but he didn't wow me this time out. He's got such a female fan base that he's probably safe, but this would have to be the worse Scotty performance of the year.

Casey Abrams: "Nature Boy" from Moulin Rouge. This song was originally sung by Nat King Cole. I LOVE Nat King Cole. I also enjoyed what Casey did with this song. He jazzed up his performance with his upright bass for the second week in a row, and it worked for me. He growled, he scatted, he had a great time interacting with his back-up band and the audience. Casey also sported a much shorter beard this week. I would almost call it the Miami Vice look because it appeared that he hadn't shaved in a couple of days. I like it. One piece of advise though. Casey, if you want to keep the young girls and the grandma's voting for you, be careful when you squint your eyes. Mr. Evil starts popping back. It's not a good look.

Haley Reinhart: "Call Me" from American Gigolo. Haley, Haley, Haley. Two pieces of advise: 1. You look a lot more classy when your outfits cover you better. 2. I enjoy your vocals much more when you don't shriek and scream. CALL ME! CALL ME! CALL ME! OK, I know that these are the lyrics but you don't have to sound so desperate or angry. Perhaps this is her way of urging the American public to call her American Idol phone number.

Jacob Lusk: "Bridge Over Troubled Waters" from The Pursuit of Happiness. Jacob is an amazing vocalist. He sang this song with emotion, expression, and conviction. Steven said that he sang it like an angel. I agree. The last three notes were totally amazing!

James Durbin: "Heavy Metal" from Heavy Metal. OK, it's official. I haven't seen ONE of the movies they high-lighted tonight. And that's OK. James asked us to "give metal a chance." I gave metal a chance and...I didn't care for it. James is very talented and I'm sure he's entertaining to certain segments of the American Idol audience. I'm just not one of them. His vocals and energy will carry him through another week. I don't see him in the bottom three tonight.

So, who had the best performance? Casey, Jacob, and Lauren.

Who do I predict will be in the bottom three? Paul (because he went first), Haley, (too much screaming for my taste), and Stefano. (What a surprise.)

Who is going home? I've never gotten this right, but tonight I predict it will be Paul. Now watch, Stefano will FINALLY be leaving this week.

Knights in Shining Armor

I'm sure that my faithful readers have been tossing and turning all night long, losing precious sleep as they worry about my graduation dilemna.

Oh, you haven't?

You don't even REMEMBER my graduation dilemna?

Well, let me remind you of the details.

About 24 years after I started a family, I returned to college to complete my degree. For the past five years I have taken one BYU Independent Study class at a time. It was overall, a lovely experience.

After spending 5 intense weeks madly writing multiple papers, I completed my last class. I was now able to graduate! There was great rejoicing in the land (at least in my home) and then, I received the unpleasant news--it was too late to order my cap and gown. Without a cap and gown, I could not walk. Without a cap and gown it would THWART my plans to stand next to Jennifer as she graduated. Without a cap and gown it would THWART my ambition of appearing in a possible future print ad or TV commercial with Jennifer by my side advertising the success of the BGS program and the bonds of mother-daughter relationships.

You can see I have very big ideas.

It was a very sad day. I lost sleep. Sigh.

But, NEVER fear! My darling Utah daughters were determined to come to my rescue.

Christie was planning on setting up her lawn chair, her lap top, and camping out at the Hinckley Center to buy one of the few remaining coveted caps and gowns.

Heather, in her fog-induced CPA tax preparation haze probably did not EVEN know what great plans I had in store for her in case Christie could not camp out. She was going to be the back up.

Lucky, lucky girl.

Jennifer however had an even MORE clever plan. She decided to advertise my heartfelt dilemna.

On Facebook.

Yes, once again, Facebook united people together, or in this case, Facebook united Jennifer to a friend of a friend who had a cap and gown that they would be willing to loan me.

This is what she posted:

"Attention, BYU alumni: Does anyone have a cap and gown they would be willing to let my mom borrow? She's willing to pay a rental fee."

Then she went on to explain:

"Nearly 30 years after leaving college to raise a family, my mom has accomplished her goal of graduating. However, she wasn't notified that she would be eligible to graduate until after the deadline to order a cap and gown. She would really like to be able to walk with me and celebrate her accomplishment. "

The first offer was from a lovely gentlemen who was too tall. (But, I would have taken it anyway.)

The second offer was from a lovely lady who was too short. (But, I would have taken it anyway.)

The third offer was JUST RIGHT!

So, next week I will be marching into the Mariott Center looking up into the vast audience with tears streaming down my face--thanks to the love and support of my darling daughters. They are truly my knights in shining armor.

United We Stand

Grab yourself a cup of hot cocoa. Put in a couple of marshmallows and let it melt just a little and slowly sip as I tell you three stories.

Story One

When I was in high school, my dad was diagnosed with leukemia. We hoped and prayed that my dad would be healed. One particular weekday, our ward held a special fast for my dad. Our family was touched that they loved us enough to do this. As I was at school that day, I remember sitting on the grass during lunch with my good friends. One friend noticed that I wasn't eating my normal peanut butter and honey sandwich, crispy apple, and homemade chocolate chip cookies for lunch. Instead, I sat there quietly talking to them. When she asked why I wasn't eating, I replied it was because I was fasting and praying for my dad. She looked at me quietly and then said something that I've never forgotten:

"I wish you had told me. I would have fasted for your dad, too."

I was touched. She was not a member of my church and I don't even know if she had fasted before. I felt her love that day that she wanted to be united in my cause and do something for my family.

Story Two

About two years ago, my husband was told he was getting laid off. Our family immediately began fasting and praying that he would be able to find employment quickly. We called and e-mailed family and close friends and asked if they would join us in fasting for Ron. Everyone we talked to seemed genuinely interested and willing. We felt great strength as we united our faith. The job offer didn't come that week or even that month, but Ron was only without a paying job a few weeks before a job offer came. We are so grateful for the love and support of our family and friends.

Story Three

A few weeks ago, my sweet daughter asked that we pray for her wonderful husband, Jacob. He needed to pass a few tests to graduate from the Police Academy. Of course, we were willing to do that. When I mentioned this to my Mom, she said, "Jennifer should ask the entire family to pray. There is strength in unity."

I shared that with Jennifer. A week or so later, Jennifer sent out an e-mail to Jacob's and her extended family. Parents, grandparents, brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles, and cousins were asked to join in a special fast for Jacob that he would be able to do well on his upcoming tests. There were many heartfelt prayers in the following days. Last Thursday night, Jennifer text-ed Emily and let her know his tests would be the next day.

Early Friday morning, Jennifer sent out another mass e-mail asking for family members to remember Jacob in their prayers that day. He was taking his tests that evening. I spent part of the day working in the temple and many of those minutes were spent in prayer that Jacob would do well.

Friday evening, we received another phone call from Jennifer. Jacob passed all three tests easily. We rejoiced with them and are so grateful that prayers were answered.

There is great strength in unity. There is strength in uniting our faith and our prayers. Sometimes, the answer isn't what we want it to be. My dad did not recover from leukemia. But, even though the outcome wasn't what we hoped for, we felt loved and buoyed up and filled with hope for better days.

Jennifer recently posted on her blog, "I really, really love my family."

I echo that. I really, really love my family.

Silver and Gold

Make new friends,
But keep the old.
One is silver
And the others gold.

We have been in our new home 8 months and it finally feels more like home. I no longer dread going to church and wondering who I will talk to. I no longer get lost as I run errands. I feel more comfortable living here and it feels good.

Oh, there are still hard times. A month ago our stake was having a Relief Society Conference. I walked into the chapel and did not see anyone I knew. As I attended the workshops I forced myself to talk to "strangers" that someday might become acquaintances and perhaps even friends. They were very nice, but it was very uncomfortable as I looked around the room and saw women who were obviously good friends. I wondered if I would ever feel that sense of belonging. When it was time for lunch, I felt like leaving. But, I forced myself to stay. I walked into the Cultural Hall and scanned the room. I saw one table with a few women from my ward. I hesitantly walked over towards them and timidly asked if there was room for me. If they had said every seat was taken, I would have smiled and quietly walked out of the room, out to my car, and drove home. Fortunately, there was an empty place and they seemed happy to have me join them. So, even though I still feel uncomfortable at stake events, my ward is starting to feel more like home.

Recently I have seen that friendships are forming. Let me give you three examples:

A couple of Mondays ago, my visiting teachers were supposed to come over at 1:30 pm. About noon I had received an e-mail from BYU's Independent Study saying that my last class was graded. I had received an A and I was so excited that I truly was finished. A couple of minutes later, the phone rang. It was Jennifer, one of my visiting teachers. She told me that she and Annie were at an Italian restaurant and they wondered if I would like to join them for lunch. I had never heard of this place and asked for directions. I was so proud of myself that I actually KNEW where these streets were and drove their without hesitation. After I arrived, I shared my good news that my last BYU class was finished. They rejoiced with me. We talked for nearly three hours and it felt for a few moments like I was having lunch with my Stockton friends. We shared some tender feelings of the heart. I think they were inspired to change our visiting teaching plans so we could get to know each other on a deeper level. Some silver friendship strands were formed.

The next day, another woman in the ward called. I feel a connection to Karen and feel like we could become very good friends. She has a daughter Emily's age and Laura told her mom that Emily was struggling to find a white shrug for her prom dress. Karen had been out shopping and came across a white shrug she thought would be perfect.

"I bought three of them--small, medium, and large," she told me. "You can have her try them on and pay me for the one you keep and I'll return the others."

I was so touched with her thoughtfulness. When she came over later that afternoon, we visited for 15 minutes talking about a wide variety of subjects. More silver strands of friendship were formed.

Last week for Mutual, our ward has an Amazing Race activity. They thought that all the leaders would need to drive, but four young women leaders (including myself) didn't need to. We stuck around to help with the scoring when the teams came back. We visited with each other and I learned some of the joys and struggles that the other women serving in Young Women are going through right now. A few more silver strands of friendship were formed.

I miss my "golden friends" in Stockton. I miss Marian and her thoughtfulness. I miss Trina and Velvet and how they could always make me laugh. I miss Alexandria and her generosity. I miss Julie and our long walks and talks. I miss Shirley and our talks about education and the school system. I miss Maxine, Juliene, Pat, and Julie and our lovely book club. I miss Candy, Sheri, Lori, Sandy, Ruth, and Sally and our "Sew What's New" evenings. I miss my wonderful sister-in-law Vicki and how we became good friends the last few years that we lived in Stockton. I miss ANOTHER Marian and how we shared favorite books and the joys and struggles of motherhood. I miss many, many other wonderful women as well. I miss the love and support they have shown me over the years. I will always treasure these golden friendships.

I am grateful for the "silver" friends that I am beginning to make. Women NEED friends in a way that men seldom do. Our husbands and children are the most important people in our lives, but it's our mother, sisters and our friends who bring an added dimension. We rejoice with each other when times are good. We cry with each other with times are hard. We are each others support system.

So to my friends--the silver and the gold--thank you for making my life fuller and richer.

American Idol--The Final 9

Last week, I predicted correctly that Thia (who I think would be a GREAT friend for Emily in real life) and Naima would be in the bottom three. I was wrong about the third and thought that Stefano would be joining the girls. However, it was (gasp) Paul who ended up in the bottom three and Thia and Naima were our dearly departed. Let's see how I do today in my great predicting skills.

Last night the theme were songs from the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.

Jacob Lusk: "Man in the Mirror"--He had some problems with his ear monitor and quickly removed it. Despite the technical issues, he did marvelous! He took this Michael Jackson song and gave it a soulful, gospel flair. This was one of my favorite performances of the night. OK, I didn't really care for all the hip shaking, but everything else was perfect. And Jacob--I'm so glad you stood up for yourself and sang a song that fits your convictions. Good. for. you.

Haley Reinhart: "Piece of My Heart"--They have been telling Haley week after week that she has a little Janis Joplin inside of her. Tonight, she gave the judges her take on a Janis song. She sang the first few notes and then morphed into a screaming and growling performer. This was probably my least favorite performance of the evening. I just don't like being screamed at. Props on her outfit tonight though. I appreciated a more modest Haley.

Casey Abrams: "Have You Ever Seen the Rain"--Now this is the Casey that I fell in love with--standing next to his upright bass. Randy thinks he's revolutionary performing like this. I agree. I LOVE IT! The growl is still there in his voice but more importantly, there is a smile on his face AND in his eyes. No more Mr. Evil.

Lauren Alaina: "You Make Me Feel Like a Natural Woman"--Her mentors decided that her singing style tonight was Contrsoul--a combination of country and soul. She did a GREAT job! She had a couple of big notes about midway through her performance and the last note? Incredible.

James Durbin: "While My Guitar Gently Weeps"--OK, I was not familiar with this particular George Harrison song. Does this make me a bad person? No. Does this make me an uneducated person? Perhaps. Now, Ron--he was very familiar with this song. See how well we balance each other out? James usually runs and jumps all over the stage. It was great seeing a calmer, more restrained performance from James. He felt like this was his time to show that he could perform more than the frenetic songs he's known for. He did a very nice job. And there were was an incredible BIG note at the end. I kept thinking--breathe! Breathe!

Scotty McCreery: "That's All Right, Mama"--Scotty loves Elvis Presley. When he was young, he dressed like Elvis. He tried to sing like Elvis. Tonight it was time for him to honor the King of Rock and Roll with his version of an Elvis song. It was so much fun watching Scotty perform. At the end of his performance, he was "mobbed" on stage by a few young female fans. Very reminiscent of Elvis. Another one of my favorite performances.

Pia Toscano: "River Deep, Mountain High"--She promised last week that if she went through that she would FINALLY choose an uptempo song. She did not disappoint. She is probably one of the best singers in the competition. The only thing she needs to work on is showing a little more personality on stage.

Stefano Langone: "When a Man Loves a Woman"--Stefano has picked up an unfortunate David Archuleta mannerism. He licks his lips. Not a good look. Doesn't he know that his lips will become very chapped if he continues to do that? OK, now to his performance. Stefano is a good singer, but he isn't a great one. He's TRYING much harder to connect with the audience. But for me, something is still missing. When we both figure it out, he'll do much better.

Paul McDonald: "Folsom Prison Blues"--Last week, Paul was in the bottom three which SHOCKED me greatly. Greatly. Tonight, he gave one of the best performances of the evening. I've seen Folsom Prison (from the outside, thank you very much) and I can almost picture the prison inmates rocking away to Paul's version of this Johnny Cash song. One of the best performances of the evening.

So, who did best? Scotty, Paul, and Jacob.

Who is in danger? Jacob, (because he went in the dreaded first place), Haley, and Stefano.

Who is in danger of going home? Stefano. Sorry David Archuleta (my all-time FAVORITE American Idol) but Stefano's lip-licking must go.

April Sixth

Last weekend at General Conference, Elder Richard J. Maynes of the Seventy talked about the importance of families establishing Celestial Traditions.

I like that phrase...celestial traditions. I know he was referring to such traditions as attending church together, having family home evenings, family prayer, and family scripture study, but it made me think about what OTHER kind of traditions could be considered celestial traditions.

I think many Christmas traditions can be considered Celestial traditions. I love our Bethlehem Dinners, baking cookies for friends and family, and reading the Christmas story from the scriptures.

I think our Joseph Smith Birthday celebration could be considered a celestial tradition because we are remembering the birthday of a latter-day prophet who restored the Church of Jesus Christ in these last days.

Many Easter traditions can be celestial traditions as we focus on the true meaning of the holiday.

Today, I thought of a NEW tradition to implement in our family.

April Sixth.

What's so significant about April 6th you ask? Well, I'll tell you.

Modern day prophets, including Harold B. Lee and Spencer W. Kimball have told us that April 6th was the actual day that Jesus Christ was born in that tiny town in Bethlehem. (See Ensign, July 1973, p. 2; May 1980, p. 54.)

Mary and the Christ Child.

April 6th was also the day the church was organized in a little log cabin in Fayette, New York.

Artist's rendition of organization of Church in Peter Whitmer's home.

Tonight, I will be fixing a special April 6th dinner. This year it is going to be Chicken Pot Pie. I don't know if they ATE chicken pot pie in the 1830's, but it's homey and somewhat old fashioned.

Then, I'm going to serve a yummy homemade cake. We are going to sing "Happy Birthday" two different times--one to Jesus Christ and one to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Yes, that will be a mouthful to sing.

After blowing out the candles (I'll put on a few for symbolism's sake) we'll read D&C 21 which talks about the organization of the church.

I love celebrating special times with my family. Hopefully, this will become one celestial tradition that our family will carry on for years to come.

Conference Traditions

General Conference is this weekend and I'm excited. It's a time to recharge my spiritual batteries and spend a weekend pondering on things that I need to improve in my own life. Our family has a few conference traditions that make the weekend even more special.

• Today I spent the morning giving the house a good cleaning. It's hard for me to focus on the messages when I'm surrounded by clutter. I didn't spend a great deal of time doing extra chores. But the carpets are vacuumed, the hard floors are mopped, the furniture is dusted and the bathrooms are clean.
• Conference breakfast is usually a special treat. Sometimes we enjoy fruit cocktail, sometimes cinnamon rolls, and recently it's been Grandpa Jack's Life-Enhancing Breakfast Casserole.

What's that? You want to know what Grandpa Jack's Life-Enhancing Breakfast Casserole is? Well, the ingredient list doesn't sound too life enhancing. Eggs. Bacon. Hash Browns. Cheddar Cheese. But, it kept my Aunt Alice alive for nearly two years. It's about all she could eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner so it MUST have some magical quality.

• This year for Sunday's breakfast, we are going to do something NEW for Conference breakfast. I got this idea when I taught Laurel's last week. We are going to have a Waffle Bar. Think yummy homemade waffles with several toppings to choose from. Fresh strawberries. Milk chocolate chips. Whip Cream. Syrup. Doesn't it sound yummy?
• Another conference tradition is playing Conference Bingo. You can find these cards on a lot of other websites. I buy a large bag of M&M's and Skittles. Whenever a word is mentioned, you got to place an edible marker on your square. Once you have a BINGO, you get to eat that row or column and start again. My children loved this when they were younger and I've heard rumors that my married daughters STILL do this because after all..."It's TRADITION!"
• When Ron's at Priesthood, one of my FAVORITE traditions is having "Girl's Night In." We pull out the facial cleansers and masks, the foot scrubs, and the nail polish and sit around and pamper ourselves. We watch a movie. This year, it's going to be Tangled. We also usually indulge in hot fudge sundaes. However, with Emily's new health kick, we may be indulging in air popped popcorn this year.
  
• Besides playing Conference Bingo, we take notes. I star the speakers whose remarks especially touched me to make sure I remember what they talked about and study their words when the Conference issue of the Ensign comes out.
• We watch the programming between sessions of Conference on BYUTV. I may not always sit in the room, but I'm listening to what is on. Many times they show a great movie right after the afternoon sessions, too.
  

Conference Weekend! It comes twice a year and I'm always ready for it.